Monday, December 31, 2012

Chris Colley's TV Blog*'s 10 Lumps of Scripted TV Coal I Received And Watched In 2012 (Euphemism For 10 Worst, Because Worst Is Too Strong)

I gave you my 11 favorite shows, now it's time for me to tell you about 10 shows I was extremely disappointed in during 2012.  A lot of these shows were canceled, or are going to be canceled.  One show will end up on this list, just because it aggravates me.  Being ranked number 1 on this list means I thought you were the worst of the worst.  Being ranked on this list doesn't mean I didn't watch every episode (or even that it was overtly terrible), it's just that I thought the shows could have been done a lot better.  However, some of these shows were overtly terrible, and yet I still couldn't avert my eyes.  Again, Happy New Year, and thanks for reading!

 1.  Last Resort (ABC)

Last Resort had a good Pilot.  The U.S. Government tried to sink a rogue sub.  Even though they missed, the sub still sank all on its own.  Even though this might not be the worst show on the list, it surely was the most disappointing.  That's why it deserves to be number 1 on this list.

2. The New Normal (NBC)

I tried the show, and just couldn't get into it, at all.  It was a sitcom that wasn't in the least bit funny, to me.  It's clearly appealing to some people, as it looks like it's a sure pick up for a second season.  I'll stick to my favorite Ryan Murphy show, American Horror Story: Asylum, which barely missed out on my favorite shows of 2012 list.  The dude clearly has some issues...lol.

3. Animal Practice (NBC)

I watched every unfunny minute of this TV show.  Slapstick played straight just comes across as dumb.  A tonal adjustment in this show could have paid big dividends, but they locked themselves in a dark room they could never escape from.  There were two enjoyable characters on the show (Dr. Yamamoto and Angela), but everything else was just completely forgettable.

4. House of Lies (Showtime)

I wrote about this show last season in the post, HOUSE OF LIES: When Sex Sells A Bad Product.  I heard it got better after I quit watching it, but that's kind of like saying you never felt better right after being diagnosed with cancer.  You still know it's probably going to have a bad outcome in some way, shape, or form.  I won't be re-visiting it in the second season, despite Don Cheadle being one of my favorite actors ever.

5. Don't Trust the B---- in Apt. 23 (ABC)

This show had a really nicely absurd first season, but it fully believed its own hype for season 2.  This show became exactly as terrible as I thought it would be based on the original trailer I saw for the show.  This show is dead as a doornail, and my main note to the network is to CUT OUT JAMES VAN DER BEEK.  As a very rarely used gimmick casting, he could have been really interesting.  Instead, he might have ruined the ability to watch him seriously in anything again ever.  The makers of this show are guilty as charged, with overuse of a gimmick actor.  The DWTS storyline was about the worst I have ever seen.  It would have worked if he had actually been on DWTS, but he wasn't, so it came across as way dumb and overused.  This show could have been something, based on the absurdity of season 1, but it didn't, because it believed its own hype.  Oops.

6. Ben and Kate (FOX)

If you are one of the few people on the planet that enjoy this show, I applaud you.  I thought the show was creepy in premise, and I had to stop after the episode where they had to go see the Principal.  It was so creepy, and the lead characters seem like their development stopped somewhere around 11 or 12 years old.  It just didn't work at all, for me, and, yep, it's going to pay for that by being canceled. 

7. The Newsroom (HBO)

If you remove all of the relationship b.s. from The Newsroom, it's easily one of the best shows on television.  If you take out all of the good stuff from The Newsroom, it's a flaming pile of terrible relationship bulls***.  The way the show plays, the relationship b.s. is there close to 50 percent of the time.  That stuff is truly unbearable to watch, and keeps this show far away from being a top tier show.

8. The Big C (Showtime)

At the end of season 2, a major character died, evidently in an attempt to tug at our heart strings.  At the beginning of season 3, that character was alive.  I thought, for a minute, that he was an apparition.  It turned out he wasn't, he was still alive.  I never tuned in for episode 2 of the third season.  It's a shame this show, which had a great first season, managed to become so bad, in such a short amount of time, that I stopped watching it.

9. Vegas (CBS)

I have several episodes of this turd like imitation of some show resembling some form of Las Vegas that never existed, or something piled up on my DVR.  As of today, I've decided to just delete them.  The show's getting canceled, anyway, so it shouldn't matter.  A word of advice is if you're trying to do a historical drama, pay pretty close attention to the details.  The massive amount of errors in this show was extremely offputting.  The story was never good enough to overcome the errors, for me, so it seems like it's just best to say goodbye to the show.  This is easily the most disappointing show of the year, because it could have been so much better than it ultimately was.  I almost feel bad that I ever defended the Pilot.

10. Homeland (Showtime)

For all of the negative stuff I said in my favorite shows list, that's why Homeland is here.  It deserves to be on the best and worst list.  The only other candidate that can be in a similar situation next season is The Newsroom.  This will be the last time I care enough to put Homeland on both lists.

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